What's the best thing you can say to a person who is dying?

  1. “I’m glad you were in my life. I’m glad I knew you. I wouldn’t trade your presence in my life for anything.”

  2. Its a bit late in my case. They're already gone and all I have left are pictures and voicemails. But I figured it'd be an interesting question and maybe a comfort in some way.

  3. Actually hospices are no hospitals but care homes specialized in end-of-life care. The main difference is that everything is aimed at relieving the guest's suffering holistically – not just by medication but also by fulfilling last wishes, offering pastoral care, massages, aroma therapy, etc.

  4. I had a friend that died of pancreatic cancer and the last time I spoke with him I told him I was going to miss him.

  5. My mom died from Stage 4 lung cancer. Last conversation she was coherent for was me asking for advice on my first date ever. She just told me "don't be goofy" in a teasing way.

  6. It would depend on whether they know they're dying or not. Someone who has end stage cancer knows they're dying all you can say is you love them and will miss them. Someone who's just suffered some catastrophic trauma like a car wreck, I'd tell them they're going to be ok. I'd tell them it's bad, but not that bad - the docs will fix them back up. So their last seconds include hope and not only fear/terror.

  7. In the minutes before my Grandma died, I told her it’s ok to go, that I love her and I would be ok. I also told her that her favourite dog of all time ( passed away years ago) was waiting there for her and wanted a walk.

  8. My dad has brain cancer, a very aggressive type, diagnosed 3 months ago. I woke up at 5am today to 14 calls from my son who lives with him. He is in ICU and has been seizing all day, even on meds. My son held the phone up for him (he is awake but not responsive) so I could say goodbye. The first thing I told him was that it was okay to let go, he doesn't have to fight or suffer any longer and that I loved him and was thankful I was blessed with him as my father. He is on comfort care now and expected to pass in the next few days. I know he heard us talking to him, as he squeezed my son's hand and a single tear fell from his eye. I wanted him to know he didn't have to be strong in that moment.

  9. "All life is transitory, a dream. We all come together in the same place, at the end of time. If I don't see you again here, I will see you, in a little while, in a place where no shadows fall."

  10. Dad died this past February 12th. For the previous five days, he was medicated with morphine and Ativan to reduce terminal agitations so he could stay in his assisted living facility. He was not communicative, but for the first couple of days, we would announce when we arrived and hold his hand. He would squeeze when we asked, but was not understandable due to the medication and strokes he had suffered years before. The last several days, he was not responsive even with hand squeezes.

  11. If you share something in common a river a mountain a road tell them to save you a place in the canoe on the trail or shotgun. And look them dead in the eye with all earnestness and say I'm going to miss you but I'll see you soon.

  12. The last thing I said to my grandma when she was in the hospital was: "You know that I love you, don't you?" She laughed heartily and answered "How could I not know?"

  13. Letting them know that it is okay to go to a place without pain. That you will be okay and that those left behind will take care of each other. That’s what I told my mom.

  14. Shit i dont even know if i could say anything at that time. Id be too emotional probably

  15. Consider yourself lucky that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far... consider yourself lucky that it won't be troubling you much longer.

  16. Ask them to share their favorite memories and record the conversation. Especially if it's a relative and you'll never get a chance to do so again.

  17. I sat with my mom the last 24hrs of her life in the hospital, watched her take her last breath. I wanted to say so much, but very little came out. It's hard to explain, there's nothing perfect you can say.

  18. "Hey, give me your phone, if anyone calls about your car warranty, I'll tell them you're dead and make them regret calling you"

  19. This was posted a long time ago on a newsgroup by J. Michael Straczynski, Babylon 5's creator(great show!) that really strikes resonance with me:

  20. Listen to their stories and let them know you’ll share them so their story goes on and they’ll be remembered. Friends’ 12 year old son died last month. He was worried no one would remember him. We asked what stories of his he’d like us to share. We talked about the silly things he did that made us laugh. We shared our own stories of him. Thank you Make A Wish for half of the stories. The things they did for him meant so much to everyone who loved him. Especially his parents. He was also very worried about his parents and siblings. We made sure he knew that we’d watch over them and not let them fall apart. We had a food train going already and let him pick what meals we’d make for his family after he was gone. That we’d keep the train going for as long as his parents needed it. We’d celebrate his birthday with them. Also, going to the funeral of a 12 year old sucks. Fuck cancer.

  21. When my dad was dying ..I just went in , held his hand and thanked him for being such a great dad , expressed how much I loved him and would miss him . Promised to take care of his granddaughters , my girls , and make sure they would always remember him and know he loves them and watching over them

  22. This may sound familiar, but to family members who are just clinging on cause they don’t wanna leave you, a simple “you can rest now, we’ll be okay”, is all they need to go peacefully

  23. My dads father in law was a creep. When he did was dying my dad whispered in his ear he’d be in hell soon for everyone he did. He def responded to that, elevated heart rate…eyes moving back and forth

  24. i had an a experience of a life time was doing 150 in a 65 rolled my bmw 30 times i get out with a broken arm and ankle but my bf didn't survive the 3 nd fried is in a wheelchair im felling terrible im deeply in pain mentally i guess we just gota do better im now driving an audi s4 v8 2 turbos the bemmer is still near my house to this day

  25. "The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues.

  26. The ride is slowly coming to an end. Please disembark to let the next passengers on. I will be off the ride soon, and to you, it'll be like the blink of an eye, turn around and I'll be there. Then we will never be apart, in pain, or unhappy again. You made it! Say hi to (loved ones and pets who have passed), and let them know I'm on the way soon. I love you. Thank you for being in my life. You can go, I'll be right there.

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